Suicide Is Painless?

   

     On March 7, my mother, whom I care for as best I can, went into the hospital.  It wasn't anything serious other than something she has become accustomed to doing---seeking comfort in medicine for her chronic aches and pains.  Sadly, my mother is one of the 26% of the elderly population in the United States that misuses or abuses prescription medication, particularly pain medications.  Unfortunately for my mother, this recent hospital stay was almost her final one.  She was over-medicated which led to other serious conditions that nearly cost her life.  While it was an incredibly difficult time for me, I suspect, in many ways, my mother was almost relieved to be unconscious and confused.  Since she also suffers from chronic depression, her recovery from her hospital near-death-experience has been incredibly challenging.  In fact, it's been so difficult for her that the poor woman crawled into her bed and withdrew from reality.  Unfortunately, it's nothing new.
     My mother has suffered from depression for a very long time.  She probably has had bouts with depression her entire adult life, and quite possibly while she was a young girl.  Life changes cripple her.  Temporary setbacks or unexpected events become overwhelmingly tragic.  Her only coping mechanisms are sleep and avoidance, neither of which help and often times cause more problems.  It becomes a vicious cycle of tragedy brought on by personal sorrow and despair.
     For the last decade, my mother has lived with our family.  It has been a time of great reward for us and great trial.  It has been a test for me, for my patience, my strength, my resolve, and my forgiveness.  And while I am not always good at passing this test, my greatest challenge has been loving my mother through her depression, mood swings, and drug dependence.  You see, I have been depressed.  There have been a few occasions in my life where I was completely overwhelmed with my living conditions, my loneliness, my responsibilities, my doubts, and my limitations.  At times, I have found it incredibly difficult to get off the couch or out of bed.  I have even, in times of utmost despair, considered that I couldn't handle the sadness, sorrow, pain, or misery anymore.  So when my mother pulls the covers over her head and mumbles that she wishes God would take her, I understand.
     It is excruciating for me to watch my mother suffer this mental anguish.  Yet, I know there is not much I can do to help her.  I believe very strongly, that if she had access to pills, like she did recently in the hospital, that she would end her own life.  As shocking as that may seem, elder suicide is a growing problem in this country, often attributed to depression, failing health, and loneliness.  In my mother's case, the life she had planned for herself, her nursing career at the center, working well into her 70s, was abruptly interrupted when she lost her job and had a disabling stroke over a decade ago.  She has struggled to make sense of it all ever since.
     So when news broke, last week, regarding the suicide of the son of the evangelical leader Pastor Rick Warren, I was neither shocked or surprised.  Some were, of course, because Pastor Rick Warren has made quite a name for himself in the Christian community, especially since the publication of his book The Purpose Driven Life.  While there was an online outpouring of support for the Warren family, there were also the obvious questions.  Why would a Christian kill himself?  Was it his depression that drove him to take his own life?  What is the condition of this poor man's soul?  Without becoming judgmental, I think it's perfectly fair and incredibly important to consider all these questions honestly and truthfully.
      Most people who kill themselves suffer from some form of depression or drug and alcohol abuse.  This is a sad fact resulting from prolonged feelings of hopelessness and despair.  Interestingly though, while Christians experience bouts of depression like everyone else, they don't actually commit suicide as much as non-believers.  Why?  Because traditionally they have some really strong deterrent fact that actually prevents them from taking their own life.  And that deterrent is the belief that they will spend all eternity burning in the fires of Hell.
     So what of Pastor Warren's son, Matthew?  He was obviously a Christian.  I think the answer to why he decided to end his life after suffering so long from depression can be found in his own words.  "Dad, I know I am going to heaven.  Why can't I just die and end this pain?"  In a phrase---Once Saved, Always Saved.  This is what Matthew Warren believed.  This is what his father taught him and his whole congregation.  It is what my mother, a self-proclaimed Southern Baptist, believes.  The Perseverance of the Saints, as the idea is officially called, is a fundamental tenet of several Protestant sects, and it is a lie.  It is, in fact, a heresy that has caused many souls to face eternal damnation.
     The whole idea of the Perseverance of the Saints began with the grand heretic, John Calvin.  In the 1500s, Calvin, with very little theological education, rejected all the doctrines that the Church had taught and came up with his own!  His contribution to the attack against Our Lord and His Church was Calvin's Five Points, or TULIP.  The P in this acronym is Perseverance of the Saints, commonly called Predestination, or Once Saved, Always Saved.  Simply put, Calvin suggested and taught that God, for reasons known only to Him, determined beforehand who would be sent to Heaven and who would be sent to Hell.  Those people whom God has chosen, then, will go immediately to Heaven, even if they commit acts that are evil.  Those people whom God has destined for Hell can, ultimately, do absolutely no good works to merit Heaven.  For modern Protestants who hold the OSAS belief, this basically means a person, once they accept Jesus Christ, cannot lose his or her salvation.  Calvin's crazy idea is a central tenet in the Southern Baptist church, of which my mother aligns herself, and also of most of the Evangelical and Pentecostal churches.
     Just like Matthew Warren, my mother believes there is absolutely nothing she could do to lose her salvation.  And because she suffers on a daily basis, there is then absolutely no deterrent, no fear of Hell, no fear of God's wrath, to stop her from taking an overdose of pills or admitting herself into the hospital and just checking out.
     This time, my mother almost died.  In the aftermath, my husband and I considered it might be best for my mother to leave our home for the nursing home.  In my anguish over having to make that decision, I talked to my priest.  I want to do what is best for my mother, but I first and foremost want to please God.  Sensing my guilt, my priest informed me that my first and foremost duty to my mother was concern for her eternal soul.  It was a shocking consideration, indeed.  As such, he insisted that I speak to her about conversion.  It was a hard subject to approach, but when she  appeared to be fairly coherent, I asked her the question.  "Do you want to become a Catholic?"  She answered, of course, the only way she could, "I don't see much purpose in that."  My mother's Once Saved, Always Saved heart is hard.  It will be truly an act of God's grace and mercy for her to convert.  And I will constantly live wondering if one day my mother will do like Matthew Warren and end her suffering so she can "just go on to Heaven."  
     What are we to make of Matthew Warren's death?  His poor soul will never see Heaven, in spite of what he took his life believing.  It is a sad, but terrible truth.  I don't doubt Mr. Warren's life was filled with sadness and suffering.  But that is what this life is, a valley of tears.  Our Lord was born into this world to die for our salvation.  He opened the gates of Heaven for us.  Unfortunately, very few of us will ever get to share the Beatific Vision.  The Devil will see to that.


St. Dymphna, ora pro nobis.

Our Lady of Fatima, ora pro nobis.



 
   

August 4: The Feast of St. Dominic

Dominic Guzman, born in Spain, opposed the disorders of the Albigenses. He founded the Order of the Friars Preachers, propagated devotion to the Rosary, and save the Western Church from heresy and anarchy. He died in 1221.

 
    St. Dominic was a very influential man in the history of the Church. As such, there is so much to say about him that, initially, I didn't know where to begin. He was charitable, sincere, pious, intelligent, austere, persistent, resilient, and intuitive. His life was remarkable and he left the Church with a Order of preachers and nuns that is still strong and traditional today, in spite of the incredible loss of faith and modernism that has crept inside the Church. He was known to sacrifice himself and his needs for those living in poverty and slavery. During the Crusades, he fought a dangerous heresy that was threatening the Church and promising to overtake Europe. All of these accomplishments, of course, are why St. Dominic is so dear to the Church. But, today, when I meditated on his life, my heart only thought of one thing—the Rosary.

    My first introduction to the Rosary was at the home of my previously-mentioned, high school friend's grandmother. Mrs. G prayed a Rosary every night. On the rare occasion that I got to stay over with my friend at "Granny's," we were both expected to pray along. "Granny" had a tiny little basket full of these beautiful, shiny beads with a crucifix attached to the end. I always followed along, but the only prayers that were familiar to my Protestant ears were the "Lord's Prayer" and the "Gloria." Though I had heard the Apostle's Creed, I didn't really know it and I found the Hail Mary offensive. I had never really been taught praying the Rosary was wicked, but later on in some of my Protestant circles I understood that, since the Lord didn't give it to us or since it wasn't in the Bible, then we shouldn't pray it.

    Upon my eventual conversion to Catholicism, I wasn't taught much either about the Rosary. Oh sure, some people prayed the Rosary before Mass, but those were just the old "blue hairs." In some of the Churches I attended, there was a group, one-decade Rosary for vocations or to end abortion but these, too, only contained the afore mentioned prayers. I probably, also, heard somewhere that it was St. Dominic who "gave" the Rosary to the Church. But my devotion to the Rosary and my understanding of the Rosary came this last year as our family transitioned to Tradition.

    St. Dominic was born in Spain about 1170 to Felix and Joanna Guzman. Both of parents were members of Spanish nobility and their family was incredibly pious, claiming among them many saints. There is much to be said about Dominic's life to exemplify his piety and sanctity. From the age of seven he studied under the care of his uncles. He became quite learned in religious matters and he was devoted to his life of prayers. Those who knew him recognized his soft and charitable heart, especially concerning matters of the poor. He attempted, on more than one occasion, to sell himself into slavery for the liberation of other slaves. But Dominic's most recognizable talent seemed to be that of preaching. He had a tenderness about him that drew people to him. He loved them, they listened, and many people were converted. Although the information regarding his ordination to the priesthood is not available, it is clear that by 1203, St. Dominic was traveling with a missionary entourage across France and Spain during the Crusades.

    The Church has a long, interesting history on fighting heresy. Many of these heresies were, at times, unknown due to the expansion of Christianity throughout Europe. Many heresies and heretical groups lived and prospered for decades or centuries without any challenges from the Church. Many of the men and women who the Church declared Saints, particularly during the Middle Ages, were people who fought diligently to save the Church from the heresies that were spreading throughout the lands. While St. Dominic was on one of his travels, he discovered that most of the Christians in France had adopted many of the heretical beliefs and teachings that had come to them from the Orient. The heresy called Catharism had taken a stronghold over the region and its adherents had grown very hard-hearted and close minded to the Truth. I hope at a later date to write specifically about the Cathars, their beliefs, and their similarities to certain practices in modern times.

    In his wisdom, St. Dominic began to notice something peculiar about the nature of this heresy and how it had become rooted into French culture. It seemed that the women in the community had become particularly drawn to it and were convincing their husbands to follow and were also teaching their children. St. Dominic found this especially troubling but was unsure of how to tackle this problem. Since he had a special devotion to the Blessed Virgin, St. Dominic opened himself to her in prayer, asking for her intercession. As a sign to him, She presented Herself to St. Dominic in several visions. From one of the visions, St. Dominic understood that, since the promulgation of the heresy was being initiated with the women, the solution must come through them as well. This led him to found his Order of Preachers, or Dominicans, and Order for both men and women.

    In spite of the help from the Dominican friars and nuns, the Cathar heresy continued to spread through France. And St. Dominic continued to pray. One evening in 1208, while St. Dominic was in prayer in his chapel, Our Blessed Mother appeared to him again. He continued to ask for her aide in helping to fight this horrible heresy that was infecting the Church and leading souls to ruin. This time Our Lady answered him by saying, "Pray My Psalter and teach it to your people. The prayer will never fail." Initially, St. Dominic was a bit confused, but through her continued words to him, he began to understand what She was asking. We are not certain how long it took for St. Dominic to collect his thoughts or how Our Lady directed him, but we are certain that he did what She asked. St. Dominic taught the brothers and sisters of his Order to pray what Our Lady called the Rosary and, through this action, the Cathar heresy was completely defeated and expelled.

    St. Dominic went on to live several more years in unexhausting devotion to Our Lord and His Church. He spent his life traveling, preaching, teaching, and fighting for the Truth. After one of his travels in 1221, he contracted a serious illness and died three weeks later. His life was one of such exemplarily virtue, goodness, and charity that Pope Gregory IX declared St. Dominic a saint in 1234.

    After St. Dominic began to teach it, the Rosary became one of the most treasured prayers of the Church. Catholics since that time have had a particular devotion to the Rosary to fight of sickness and evil. In times past, the Rosary was a common prayer in Catholic Churches and homes. Catholics carried them everywhere, in their purses and pockets, and were often spotted counting their beads or kissing their crucifix. Today, like other Catholic practices, devotion to the Rosary has fallen out of favor. Some Catholics pray the Rosary every day, others occasionally, some during Lent, and some not at all. In fact, many modern Catholics don't even know what the prayers are or why we pray the Rosary anyway. Many people would say this is just symbolic of our increasingly secular culture. I don't believe that. I believe that Catholics don't pray it because the Church doesn't teach us too.

    What is the Rosary anyway and why should Catholics pray it? The Blessed Virgin Mary promised St. Dominic that if he taught his people to pray it, then heresies would be extinguished and the True Church would be triumphant? Based on tradition, it would seem that the Church believed this for much of her history. Wouldn't the Rosary be especially important for today's Catholic Church when heresies abound and have taken root in the forms of Protestantism, Modernism, Feminism, Liberalism, Communism, or any other –ism out there? Why aren't Catholic Churches hosting Rosary campaigns or round-the-clock group Rosaries? Maybe it's long past time devotion to the Rosary is restored.

    The Rosary is a beautiful and powerful way to meditate on the Mysteries of Our Lord's life, death, and resurrection. Since it will take a certain amount of time to explain it properly, I will leave that for another post, perhaps later this week.

St. Dominic, pray for us, that we are able to fight the heresies that have taken root in our modern Church and society.

St. Dominic, pray for us, that the Rosary can become a devotion once again in every Catholic home across the world.